Last Night...

Last night my mom's singing group came over to practice singing a song for church and Noelle and Elaine came over too to play with me. So we did what we always do and went down stairs and Elaine was on the ball I was kicking it out from under her and Noelle was laughing. Then we went outside and played (or tried to play) bad mitten. That was fun when we accually got it over! (I haven't played in so long) We played volley ball, I tried working on my front walk-over(I will never be able to do it) that's a handstand then legs flip over and you stand up with feet going one one. We were getting kinda hot so I wanted to go in the pool. They didn't have their bathing suits and said "We'll watch and throw things at you." Well Elaine did more then watch...she fell in with all her cloths on. Lol. As soon as she got in she jumped out and said "Where's my glasses?? Where's my glasses!?!" I said, "on your face" quietly figuring she would soon find them. But she was still saying "Where's my glasses?? Where's my glasses!?!" "ON YOUR FACE!" I said. She felt around her head until she found her eyes with her glasses on them. "Oh there they are!" she said. She's funny. So that's a night at my house!

128 Ways to Tell If People Play too Much Runescape

These will only make sense to people who play it.

1. You consider 500k poor
2. You leave Rune armour after a kill because it's not worth the space it takes in your pack
3. Someone can only get your attention by calling you by your RS name instead of your real name
4. Your dreams all revolve around RuneScape
5. You call up your friends and ask them if they want to help you kill some people in the woods
6. You go crazy if you have to spend more than 24 hours away from the game
7. Your history essay is on the history of RuneScape
8. You go hunting with a sword instead of a rifle.
9. It doesn't matter if you have real money as long as you have money in the game
10. You set your alarm to wake you up after 5 seconds of rest
11. You buy a computer for every room in the house so you can play RS where ever you are
12. When you attack an old lady, you claim that you are training.
13. When you pick up a penny, you wonder why it won't respawn
14. When you pk someone, they get banned.When they have to take off a digit off your combat level.
15. When Andrew says to you go away plz dont kill me.
16. You know you been playing RuneScape too long when...You go to work saying "buying pickaxe, 1gp"
17. "You are at gunpoint and you say "go ahead, I'll only drop five bucks
18. "Your clicking finger is the strongest muscle in your body
19. You go to school and realize that you forgot your pickaxe
20. Andrew goes crazy trying to create a monster that you can't kill
21. The servers crash when you log on
22. You spray paint your cat red and call it an imp
23. You perk up from you sleep when your teacher mentions the coal export in the middle east.
24. You constantly hear the repeated clicking sound from leveling mining that drives you mad.
25. The black dragon retreats from you.
26. You've reached 100 hitpoints.
27. Paralyze monster starts to work on human opponents in the wilderness.
28. You can mine dragon ore.
29. You start saying 'ty' to people when they give you something.
30. You buy a chocolate bar for 100gp at the convenience store.
31. You can mine ores even when there is no ore in the rock.
32. The store owners know you.
33. You can run in the game.
34. If someone hits a 13 on you you physically start bleeding.
35. Fish are so afraid of you that you don't need to cook them.
36. You change your social security number to match your attack, defence, and strength skills, and it fits.
37. Someone cuts you off and you start shouting"SCAMMER" down the freeway.
38. You get a system message "You have been standing in this spot for 5 Years! Please move to another area!"
39. You get a system message "Welcome to your (mining, fishing, cooking, crafting) spot".
40. When someone doesnt seem to know you, you know they're a newbie.
41. Your parents call you down for dinner using your character name.
42. You receive junk mail addressed to your character name.
43. You begin referring to authority figures as admins.
44. Theres a spot reserved for you in every building you go to
45. You dont need the online map. For anything. Ever.
46. You give people directions to anywhere by number of steps.
47. The server takes 10 minutes loading your character.
48. You wonder why all walls are not paper thin.
49. You get robbed in real life and you look for a man named Moderator to help you out.
50. You wonder what your "age" is.
51. You are at McDonalds and ask when the next burger respawn is.
52. You are at McDonalds and you fight just to talk to the attendant.
53. You brag about having played xxx ammount of hours.
54. Instead of saying, "Wanna take this out on the street?" you say, "Wanna take this to the wilderness?"
55. You ask your friend in real life does he want to go to pk in the wilderness after school.
56. You ask a priest in real-life if you can use the altar to recharge your prayer points.
57. You hear an announcement in school and you say "I just saw a system message!"
58. You try to rearrange the Periodic Table to fit Mithril, Adamantite, and Rune in it.
59. Trying to run from a schoolyard fight, you have to wait for the data to be relayed from the Skynetweb.com server.
60. Sombody dies and you say, "what did she/he lose?"
61. A police officer arrests you for assulting three innocent men and you say: "I was just training!"
62. You get an injury and begin eating apple pies and pizza thinking it'll heal you.
63. You go to the nearest bank and wonder where the Item bankers are.
64. You steal the cape off your little brother's Batman halloween costume for the extra armor point.
65. The theme of your new wardrobe is "pale green."
66. You need a new car and start calculating how much iron and coal you need to mine to build it.
67. You consider a mithril car instead.
68. You see someone in a dark brown suit and you think "newbie."
69. Your boss asks you if you know how to kill scorpions and you nearly ask him "level 21 or level 36."
70. You try to deposit pizza in your bank account.
71. You try to buy a pickaxe from your coworker because you can't remember where the nearest pickaxe spawn is.
72. You keep bumping into people because you think that you'll just pass through them.
73. You have this overwhelming urge to beat up security guards, farm animals, and short people whenever you see them.
74. You need flour, so you get some pots and try to find a wheat field.
75. You get confused when your bread recipe calls for more than water and flour.
76. When in school, you write your RS name instead of your real name on your homework.
77. When you can truly say, "Full rune armour? Yeah I can make that."
78. When you have more friends on your friends list than you do in real life.
79. When you go to your back yard and prospect each rock looking for coal.
80. When you cook something and wonder how much experience it was worth.
81. You just finished your chores and you wonder how many quest points you got.
82. When you're at low health and an entire inventory of anchovie pizzas can't heal you fully.
83. All the players in rune scape try to attack you and suddenly there is a huge crowd at the respawn spot.
84. You have your own server.
85. You have your own colored dot on the map.
86. Just for fun, the admins send a message to every PKer when you enter the wilderness.
87. Your character is part of a quest.
88. You quest points are in the triple digits.
89. You leave all the highest prayers on, fall asleep, and come back the next day, and theyre still going.
90. The dragon doesnt get 3 rounds to run away.
91. Andrew follows you around all day to "find your secret".
92. People try to blackmail you in real life for your password.
93. Other players make character names that start with yours.
94. You kill everything in the wilderness with one shot from a phoenix crossbow
95. Your entire inventory is made out of rune. even the tinderbox.
96. Just for fun, you invite newbies to the wilderness and let them kill greaters when you get them down to 1 hitpoint.
97. You can cut wood with your hands.
98. You kill somedbody and it deletes them instead of sending them to Lumby.
99. Casting Water Strike creates a new lake.
100. The anvils can't take the shots from the hammer.
101. You cast Weaken on your opponent and he goes into a coma.
102. You use a Fire Blast and the ice cave melts.
103. You're the reason they took away the PK system.
104. Your fighting stats hit triple digits.
105. You log in and everyone else logs out.
106. You walk into the wilderness and it's deserted.
107. You can kill demons with a bronze sword.
108. Monsters never get 3 rounds to run when you attack them.
109. You walk up to the greater demon spawn, and the crowd parts to let you pass.
110. You turn on Protection from Missiles, go into the wilderness for a 2-hour killing spree, and when you return, you still have prayer points left.
111. You're the best in every skill on the server status.
112. You suffer a nasty 15 second lag and come to surrounded by rune large helms.
113. When there is an option of "Do not allow people to follow me" made just for you.
114. When the server status refuses to put your name on it because it "discourages people from playing."
115. You can't find anyone to fight in wilderness level 48.
116. For fun, the mods ask if they can gang up on you.
117. You log on and people start PMing you there passwords.
118. You killed the dragon and you didn't gain a level from the quest.
119. You can open locked doors with your hands.
120. All rats and spiders in a 30-square radius of you die instantly when you walk past.
121. You have fletching and herblaw levels already.
122. Instead of seeing the "Attack" option in the wilderness, people see "Don't even try it, pal".
123. Your combat level is written in scientific notation.
124. You go to the black hole experience without a disk and come out fine.
125. Imps start tipping you off as to who took which bead, and where you can find them.
126. You kill a monster and it doesn't respawn.
127. Greaters take strength potions to fight you.
128. You ARE the server status.

Jokes

Okay so I want everyone to comment all the jokes they know and then everyone can know new jokes and laugh. I don't know hardly any good jokes so this is my way to learn some. It doesn't have to be good just post what you like.